Stupid Rabbit Hole
by VesperChan
Summary: Already in her mind she was thinking up a dozen different ways she could cover up that stupid rabbit hole so that something like this would never happen again.


**STUPID RABBIT HOLE**

Pairing: _Sakura many  
_Rating: T+  
Genre: Romance/Humor  
Words: 2197  
Standard Disclaimer applied

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She tapped her finger against the side of her arm after having folded them across her well devolved chest.

She was not happy.

_**Not**_ happy at **_all_**.

Already in her mind she was thinking up a dozen different ways she could cover up that damn rabbit hole so that something like this would never happen again. She could fill the hole up with water, but the ocean its self wouldn't be enough to fill the void of madness that lay beneath it. Sand bags were another option. She could stuff up the hole that way, but then there is always a chance that one of them would leak and eventually fall apart. She could board it up! But they could burn the wood and still get through.

She huffed once again, keeping her sea foam eyes narrowed and her annoyance evident. She wanted them to know how unhappy she was and she wanted to make them feel it. She wanted to make them _suffer_.

This wasn't suppose to be happening. She had experienced her hell once and that was enough for her. She fell down the rabbit hole all because of her damned curiosity and she had been there to suffer for three long days. It was a miracle she ever got out, what with so many people dead set on keeping her there, but she had and she wasn't going back. Wonderland, as they called it, was a place she would rather forget. It was a place of insanity and madness. If she never saw it again it would be too soon, in her opinion. So of course she would be mad to see it congregating in her living room.

"Go back," she all but hissed, squeezing her eyes shut and frowning. She could hardly stand to look at them anymore- her eyes hurt so much.

"But Sakura chan-"

"I said go back, or should I just tell you to stay here if that's what it really means?" She sounded bitter.

"That's so mean, especially after we went through so much trouble to get here," The white rabbit said, still smiling behind his mask.

She raised a thin eyebrow of pink and looked at him. "Do I look like I care about that? Get lost!"

They were far too annoying for her to be dealing with right now. She just got back from work at the hospital and she was dead tired. Of course she wouldn't let any of them see that. Heaven knows how they would act. She just needed to get them out of her house and send them off to their crack infested world and then she could take her bubble bath and finish that last vampire novel on her reading list.

"Are you always this cranky in your world, ugly?"

She flinched, hearing that name again. She turned only her eyes his way and was not surprised to find him still smiling, his one cat ear twitching as his sleek black tail waved behind him. Was there ever a time he didn't smile? When he complimented her, when he insulted her, when he teased her, when he helped her, he was always smiling that same damn smile of his. It annoyed the hell out of her!

"Stop smiling like that, you're not suppose to be here. Can't you see that, or are you all that stupid?

"We're all stupid, Sakura chan, and we're happy that way!" the one with blue eyes shouted, raising his tea cup in the air. His smaller reddish rabbit ears were hidden in his hair. If she had to peg one of them as the biggest idiot, it would be this guy, the March hare.

"Dobe, you shouldn't be proud of it in this world. It's different here, remember?" The Mad hatter said, swirling his tea and adjusting his hat. He had tried looking her in the eye earlier, but had to turn away and hide his face. It was far too embarrassing to display such a dark blush and nosebleed when everyone else was unaffected. She guessed it was because he had a wild imagination that was hard to control. Her friend Idate was like that too.

"That's right, it's different here. You won't like it here, so go back. How many times do I have to tell you this?"

"We won't be any trouble, he's already fallen asleep where he is and the rest of us are self reliant," The gryphon with long brown hair and white eyes explained while poking the mock turtle in the side. The lazy turtle mumbled something that sounded like _troublesome_ under his breath before falling back asleep. How he was able to make the long journey was still unknown. She knew him to been a lazy slow guy.

"H-he's right, you known," the most feminine of them called out. Sakura turned her whole head this time to look at the queen of Hearts who was in fact, a guy mistaken for a girl his whole life. He was perhaps the only one Sakura would tolerate out of the whole bunch. He was quiet and caring (mean and cruel in his world). Actually, it might be interesting to have him help her with her hair and make up in the morning when she was so busy.

"Of course she knows that," The Kind of Hearts said, as if had been the most obvious thing in the world. He was sitting next to his queen, holding onto the end of chain that kept the blond knave of Hearts from running away.

He had dark red eyes and long black hair that reminded Sakura of the Mad Hatter's and the Cat's hair-though the king's was much nicer. She expected that, seeing that he had so many servants to brush and comb it for him. He was though of as a kind and outgoing man by his people while Sakura just though he was cold and gruff. In fact, he was actually the older brother to the male Queen and was not (as most believed) married. He was still straight, as far as Sakura knew.

If he wasn't, she couldn't see a point to all the sexual harassment she had to go through under him.

She shifted her gaze down to the Knave of Hearts who sat on the floor beside the king. He was looking up at her and blushed when their eyes met. He was still in shackles for stealing the queen's tarts, but he had still been allowed to go on this trip with the rest of them. He didn't speak (probably because he wasn't allowed to). But she could tell he wanted to stay here as well. He looked happier here with his head in tack that with it chopped off. She vaguely wondered if that long strip of honey blond hair that fell in front of his left eye would be cut off as well if he were to be beheaded.

"Your house is so big, we won't be a pain. We'll be quiet and meek, no one will complain," mumbled the mouse as he leaned against his brother the Dormouse-who was still asleep at her feet.

It was hard to tell the two of them apart, the were so alike looking. The both had red messy hair and pale white skin. The only difference was that the dormouse (the younger of the two) had light green eyes like herself and a tattoo on his forehead off to the side. The mouse who had spoken before was much older and had cinnamon brown eyes with a speckle of red to them.

"That's beside the point, I don't want any of you here and-gah, I don't want any smoke inside the house. If you're going to do that do it outside. It'll ruin the walls!" Sakura cried in anger, standing up and pointing to the caterpillar with white hair and red makeup under his eyes. His hair was pulled back in some areas by red bands that matched the smoking stick he carried all around with him.

The last time she had met him all he had said to her, (that is, when he felt like speaking) was something about how rude and lost she was and then there was something about how she shouldn't be talking so much. She blamed it on all the smoke he inhaled. After he stopped smoking he was a fairly enjoyable fellow, but with the joint he was anything but.

He looked over at her, blinked and moved into the kitchen where the door to the deck was located. He looked like he was pouting almost, as he opened the sliding door and stepped out.

A short calm passed where no one spoke. Sakura used this time to utilize her icy glare to the fullest.

The march hare looked hesitant, blushing a bit as he played with his fingers. "We promise not to be a bother while we stay here. It's not like we bite or anything."

"Hn," hummed the mad hatter, taking a sip from his tea.

Sakura growled under her breath just thinking about all of them under her roof. "No way.

"Please, Sakura chan?"

"No."

"But-"

"No."

"You didn't-"

"No."

"I can-"

"No."

"We don't-"

"No."

"Just me?"

"No."

"Even if-"

"No."

"What if I-"

"No!"

"You don't have to-"

"NO! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY IT?" she screamed stand up and waving her hands.

The dormouse awoke momentarily and crawled over to where she was standing. He smiled sleepily before setting his head down on her feet as if they were his pillow. Sakura frowned. He was like a little kid in her presence, so she couldn't scream or kick him like she would have if it had been anyone else.

She sighed, falling back into her recliner, making sure not to move her feet out from under the red's head. "Why can't you just go back?" It came out as a sigh.

The white Rabbit, who had been looking at his pocket watch up until then, put away the gold object and smiled from underneath his mask. "I am afraid that is impossible."

She gave him a blank look. "What?"

The gryphon coughed into his hand, keeping his white eyes from her own. He was blushing too now. "We had it in our minds that you would react this way and shamelessly prepared a defense... that even you could not object to."

She didn't like how he wouldn't look at her. "What defense....?"

The black cheshire cat smiled like the devil himself and laughed a bit. "You didn't think we would all be as stupid as brainless here, would you? Of course we planned in advance. It should be going off soon."

"What should be-?"

**_BOOM_**

Sakura couldn't help but look out the window and see the large mushroom cloud that billowed into the air, coming from where she last remembered the rabbit hole being.

"You didn't-"

"W-w-we're sorry, Sakura. We knew you wouldn't want us staying with you so there was no other way if we wished to remain with you."

She was still staring wide eyed out the window to where the explosion had come from. "W-what did you use?"

"_The mad hatter's tea makes the best boom, to close up the hole and leave us with you_," the older red haired mouse lazily recited, leaning on her arm, nuzzling into it a bit. He didn't seem as sad as he once was, even though his eyes were still half lidded. She doubted they would ever be anything else.

She was still in too much shock to throw the mouse off her arm or even be mad at him. That explosion was huge and really close by. What if it had hit her house when they lit it. She could of been hurt. Then again, how did they light it?

Just then the caterpillar came back into the room, his smoking stick now dead of smoke. He took one look at her reaction and smiled at his handy work, blushing a bit.

The King of hearts straightened up in his seat and laughed, grinning widely. "Now there's no other choice, we have to stay here with you."

The cheshire cat looked ecstatic. "I'm sharing the bed with her!"

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_Cast_

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Kakashi as the white Rabbit

Naruto as the March hare

Sasuke as the Mad Hatter

Sai as the Cheshire cat

Neji as the Gryphon

Shikamaru as the Mock Turtle

Haku as the Queen of Hearts

Itachi as the King of Hearts

Deidara as the Knave of Hearts.

Sasori as the Mouse

Gaara as the dormouse

Kimimaro as the caterpillar

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AN:/ Was there anyone I missed in the cast list? I think I got everyone. I'm happy I was able I was able to write a story about so many guys without naming any of them. That was pretty you could have guessed, this was in response to the poll I put up not too long ago. I didn't plan on writing anything for the poll, but a few hours ago I saw it and got the idea for a super short oneshot. I kept going back and adding people and then 1000 words became 2000. Fun, huh?

There were a few characters from the book that I left out on purpose, see if you can guess who they were~


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